"Just one drink, lord knows I need one, it couldn't possibly hurt!"
Like a maleficent siren, it calls to you, "come on...just one, you'll feel better I promise"...ok fine..."but honey, only one more...come on...", she taunts you. She knows your secrets, she feeds off your pain like a nightmare lurking in the dark. You give in to the siren's call.
For a brief moment, you feel wonderful! Finally alleviated as you manage to flush out the voices in your head, they're gone; you feel like you could dance, sing, cry out to the world that you're happy again! Oh no my friend...little do you know, that maleficent siren coaxed you into consuming a poisonous potion.
All at once your mind begins to swirl, it twists and bends like a consuming maze with every emotion spilling out like a flooding ship. The evil begins to devour you as it contours your thoughts and toys with your heart like an ever so skilled marionette master. You no longer feel like singing, no longer feel like dancing, instead you want to scream at the top of your lungs; your mind and heart ready to implode.
You're trapped, alone with a maleficent siren whispering in your ear.
My dear readers, trust me when I say I absolutely understand doing everything it takes to drown out the pain, but heed this warning, a drowning ship only sinks. I have learned the hard way that those sinister calls only bring pain, yet they are ever so difficult to ignore. When your mind is constantly toiled by treacherous thoughts and no amount of talking about it helps, you feel forced to find a different form of relief. I found that relief (soon to become torment) in the form of alcohol, is it a coincidence my initials are AA or fate intervened? Initially, I feel grand, on top of the world! Who can stop me now? I'll tell you who...that sinister siren. One, two, three, four...how many drinks later before the pain is gone? Yet the pain comes crawling back, creeping back like the grapevine it was torn from. A moment of euphoria quickly fades into black, an insidious evil comes lurking in as every painful memory floods your mind, filling your veins with hatred and anger.
Countless times I have tried to drown my sorrows and silence my mind only to unleash what is truly skulking in the shadows. At some point, my loyal readers, I may have the courage to share what truly destroyed me...but for now, all I can say is that the anger within truly gets the best of me when I fall weak to the siren's call. After my fight against those insidious calls, I have found a new siren.
How do I drown the pain if not for a siren sinking my ship? I reinvigorated my passions. My passion for animals and nature, my passion for art and music, my passion for writing and above all... my new found passion to help others fighting the same fight.
Let's fight together and tell that siren to get f*****!!
Pardon my french...
To my fighters...
Your's truly, AA
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